In business, as in life, there is always an element of risk. and while some people are naturally more risk-averse than others, everyone experiences a certain amount of anxiety when starting something new or taking on a new challenge. what separates the successful from the unsuccessful is not the absence of fear but the ability to overcome it.
many people let their fear of failure prevents them from even trying. but as the saying goes, “the only way to fail is to not try at all.” so if you’re ever feeling paralyzed by fear, remember that it’s better to take a chance and fail than to never try at all. because in business and in life, success is always possible – but it’s never guaranteed.
Today`s Goal: When you’re feeling like this when you’re feeling defeated and afraid to fail and everything, just know that you’re not the only one because everyone that’s ever started at anything has gone through it. So just keep chugging along.
Episode Highlight:
01:26 – Especially when you’re trying to build something and you’re not sure about it. And it’s something that hasn’t been done, or no one that has done it before. No one really lean on about it. It breeds a lot of doubt.
04:52 – There`s as much as you could be making if you put your effort into yourself.
08:03 – Doesn’t matter if it’s been a couple of years like us, or if it’s your first week, and you’re doubting yourself from the get go, or it’s been 10 years, and you’re wondering if what you’re doing still working, that fear of failure is always there.
11:03 – We want to leave you, keep moving forward. We hope that our example is kind of like a handhold so that you can come with us on this journey. We want you to be there with us and on the ride.
Episode Transcript
Alyssa: Hey, everybody, welcome bac k to another episode of making mommy move show, we’re so happy that you’re here with us today. I got Larry back on with us again this week or say that to have him back on here. Today we’re going to be talking about the fear of failure, because I think that we all experienced that. What comes to mind when you think about that
Larry: Giving up, especially when it gets tough.
Alyssa: Yeah, like strong, that takes like a different breath for sure.
Larry: Yeah. Especially when you’re trying to build something and you’re not sure about it. And it’s something that hasn’t been done, or no one that you know, has done it before. No one really lean on about it. It breeds a lot of doubt.
Alyssa: Definitely. Yeah, I agree with that. I was listening to Chris and Lori’s podcast earlier today. And one of the things that they were talking about was, they were talking about having investors and like having skin in the game, because that makes it harder for you to drop out. Like when you have other people’s money that have invested in you, or contracts or anything like that, like it makes it really difficult for you and like keeps you fighting a little bit longer, which I think is applicable.
Larry: Yeah. I think even having your own skin of the game being that you have bills to pay and mouths to feed. That is there’s your skin in the game there.
Alyssa: You dont have a choice.
Larry: Yeah. Especially when you put all your cards on the table, and you’re trying to make your business your sole income. That’s a big motivating factor. But it’s also scary.
Alyssa: Yeah, that’s really scary.
Larry: Especially when you know that there’s a level of security and having a regular job, which is probably the only benefit aside from gain, the experience of working a nine to five is security.
Alyssa: But even at that, like it’s not that secure.
Larry: Depending on what you do.
Alyssa: Well, I guess that was where I was going with that was like you don’t know what your employer’s goals are? You dont know their intensions are with their bookkeeping looks like you don’t know if they’re skipping out on the IRS, you don’t know their
Larry: need, how many ads they have out on indeed.
Alyssa: But also, like, you don’t know if their intention is to sell the business in three years, or five years or eight years. And you’re planning to retire from that company.
Larry: Especially with not a corporation like it was a small.
Alyssa: Even corporations though.
Larry: Yeah, but that’s harder to mold to get screwed over on.
Alyssa: Maybe just food for thought, yeah, food for thought. You don’t have control of fear job?
Larry: Yes. Yeah. When you are an employee, you’re definitely
Alyssa: You’re at the mercy of the employer, and whatever their intentions are with their business. It’s kind of up to you to just
Larry: Hope for the best.
Alyssa: Yeah.
Larry: You know, your cheques clear on Friday, and that they’re open on Monday., that’s something that we’ve been struggling with is me leaving my nine to five, to put all our eggs in our own basket. And it’s a hard thing to do.
Alyssa: Battling that fear of failure., we know our work ethic, we know what we do. We know our goals. We know our intentions, we know the businesses that we have the potential income streams, that it’s just a matter of marketing, really,
Larry: And putting the time into it. And spending 10 hours a day, somewhere where you have that security, but it’s not even really as much as it should be, or as much as you could be making if you put your effort into yourself.
Alyssa: But it’s also battling that limiting mindset, that scarcity mindset. What if it doesn’t work out? You can’t give yourself that choice. You have to be all in mentally.
Larry: Yeah. And it’s hard to especially for us, like our businesses are kind of seasonal being in the wedding industry, more or less. It’s got its busier season and it’s slower season. You know that it’s it’s year round,
Alyssa: People are getting married me through November, those of the businesses season., and then December through April. It’s a lot slower.. Not that they don’t get married. It’s just it’s not as busy.
Larry: Yeah, the volumes not, as much. So that’s what’s part of my hesitation, is that leaving my job now in September, which is like the busiest month, knowing that it’s coming up on a slow season of the businesses that we’re going to be in, it almost feels like setting up for failure. But I know that the job that I work also gets slow in the winter. So it’s been 50 hours a week at one place and make meh paycheck or spend all my time working our businesses at home and could be an infinite return for as much work as I’m willing to put in.
Alyssa: Yes. 100% Yeah, we’re trying to, we’re just trying to be honest with you guys, be open, bring you along on the journey with us because it’s not easy. We’re not trying to make it look easy. We’re trying to be very vulnerable with you and show you that we’re doing it we’re doing our freakin best.
Larry: And then it’s not always sunshine and rainbows. I’m sure you can tell by the tone of this one that we’re going through it a little bit mentally.
Alyssa: And we just went through like all of our financials, and we’ve got so much money going out right now. Between trying to grow all of our businesses and support our family., we’re trying to figure out just how to do it, especially with him coming full time in the businesses.
Larry: Because my income was enough to keep the lights on.
Alyssa: Even at that,, it wasn’t
Larry: After really sit down and crunching the numbers on everything.
Alyssa: It helps, but it wasn’t, it isn’t.
Larry: And also coming to find that in our one business or wedding strike business, if I work for not even six hours, I make a whole week’s paycheck.. But the fear of failure is huge for anyone starting. And doesn’t matter if it’s been a couple of years like us, or if it’s your first week, and you’re doubting yourself from the get go, or it’s been 10 years, and you’re wondering if what you’re doing still working, that fear of failure is always there.
Alyssa: And I guess you could also say like
Larry: it’s motivating too
Alyssa: it is very motivating. Because you don’t want to let yourself down. You don’t want to let anybody else down around you. You don’t want to let your kids down. If you’re worried about, like we had talked about in the other episode about people pleasing, if you’re worried about disappointing or like appearing less than perfect, like that could be motivating for you. That shouldn’t be your motivation. But sometimes i guess
Larry: You know, be a bit afraid of that I told you so moment from the person that thinks that they’re going to be the one to tell you so about your business and whatever else you’re doing when they have no clue about it. So we know there’s been a little on the sad and they’re a little on the melancholy for sure. But, like you said, we just want to show you guys the genuine side, that it’s not easy.
Alyssa: It’s not all sunshine and rainbows.
Larry: Yeah. And it’s not all big checks and easy living, because it’s not
Alyssa: you have your highs and your lows.
Larry: there’s so much more that you don’t get to see. And pretty much everybody that you see big names, people that are already big, that already have a lot of money that already are doing successful in their businesses that they don’t want to say forgot, but they don’t discuss so much their struggle, they have their one main story where it’s like, I was living out of my car, and you know, big break. And then here I am put to see a couple going through it in real time as we’re building our businesses from the ground up. Think that’s important,
Alyssa: Very important. Those are my favorite stories. When I hear them on, like the podcasts that I listened to hearing their comp story is just incredible. I was listening to one that it was like, she was a fashion designer and trying to make it in Italy and she was like living in the factory trying to make this shit happen. And like, those are the stories that we all need to hear more of it. Like the things that they overcame, because those are like one or empowering for us to keep going.
Larry: Yeah, everyone loves a good build up combat kind of story. But on the opposite side of that is that usually each person it’s the same story. And it’s very condensed. It’s like I said, like, I was looking around in my in my car for two months. But it’s like what happened? Every single day of that two months? What was going through your head? 24 hours a day? For two months?
Alyssa: Yeah. How did you keep going?
Larry: Yeah. What was the motivation? What was the drive? What did you physically do in that time before you got up and on your feet again, and for some people, it’s a couple weeks, some people it’s a couple of years, and that they’re in that that rough patch. So we’re trying to show you the one of the rough patches that we go through, and it’s little mental,
Alyssa: It’s a little physical, but it’s a lot of mental.
Larry: Yeah. And it puts the biggest strain on you when it’s in your head because it’s the hardest place to get out of.
Alyssa: So true on that view. We want to leave you, keep moving forward. We hope that our example is you know, kind of like a handhold so that you can come with us on this journey. We want you to be there with us and on the ride.
Larry: You guys take us along on your journey to and when you’re feeling like this when you’re feeling defeated and being afraid to fail and everything, just know that you’re not the only one because anyone that’s ever started on anything has gone through it. So just keep chugging along.
Alyssa: You got this. Thanks for tuning in guys listening next time and I’ll talk to you then bye
Larry: Bye
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