Losing touch with your partner because you’re just too caught up with your businesses, goals, and kids? Dating after kids just feels impossible, right?
Many couples fall out of the habit of dating after kids, they’ve gotten too comfortable and set their sights on improving their careers, starting up new ventures, and raising their kids rather than making time to keep loving each other. Larry and I get real about times we’ve lost touch with each other and what we’ve found really helps us keep dating after kids!
Today’s Goals: Take a breath and plan dates with your partner that you can commit to regularly, even if that means you have to put down some deposit money to motivate you.
IN THIS EPISODE, WE TALK ABOUT:
- What happens when dating after kids is no longer a priority for you both as a couple
- Tips on how to make time for regular dates so you can start prioritizing each other again
- Some of our personal favorite ways to date each other each week
Episode 3 Transcript: Dating After Kids
Larry
Welcome to another episode of the Power Couple Show.
Alyssa
We’re so excited you’re here. This week we’re going to be talking about the importance of dating because we think a lot of you don’t do it enough.
Larry
Definitely not.
Alyssa
And that’s something that we’ve been really struggling with, especially with our schedule the way that it is. We want to make sure that we’re really trying to make time for us because our time gets sucked into a whole lot of other things with our businesses and our kids and cleaning the house and all of the things, so we’re gonna talk a little bit about that and some of the ways that we’re trying to keep the romance alive and see each other through.
Larry
Yes. Yeah, with the amount of stuff we have going on. We are like ships in the night with how much we see each other. So we definitely make it a point to at least once a week, do something just to have us no kids. And no work. Yeah, go out and date.
Alyssa
So thankfully, we’re blessed that my dad works with us so that he’s able to stay with our girls after they’re in bed so that we can head out on the town. At least like go get ice cream or something together and just talk and catch up and try to like peel back the layers a little bit because sometimes we get so bottled up that.
Larry
We spend so much time focusing on our businesses and work and everything else and it gets a lot that we don’t spend a lot of time just hanging out, especially as you grow up and you have kids and everything that your time gets less and less.
Alyssa
Yeah. And it’s good for us to revisit, like our goals that we’re working on together to make sure that we’re still on the same track and working together to accomplish them. But also to just like put that aside and just have two hours that were able to just be us and people watch together. Like that’s our thing we love watching. We’ll go to the boardwalk or the Chicken Or The Egg or something and just embrace the environment.
Larry
Yeah, have different conversations, whatever, whatever we might do when we’re out. Yeah, it’s definitely good for us. And if you don’t do it enough, there’s definitely a strain that comes along because we’ve gone stretches without dating and you just get frustrated. You feel like you’re more of roommates and co-workers than married.
Alyssa
Yeah, that’s a good point. We have quite a few stretches that we’ve done that we haven’t seen each other. We haven’t had sex, we haven’t anything. And it’s like we need to carve out time to like be your wife and your husband so that once like we’re strong but everything else around us is even stronger. So that’s something like we keep coming back to is that like as long as like we’re united and we’re energized and motivated and excited to do things together. Like everything else. Yeah, we’re able to like divide and conquer. Just able to come back and regroup after that.
Larry
Because of what I was feeling forgotten or left out or, you know, ignored then it reflects, you know, not as motivated to do anything. It just pushes you further apart. The further apart that you are.
Alyssa
Yeah, that’s a good one. Yeah, I like that. So some ways that we’ve been trying to never miss a date night like we built it into the calendar, well organized like with a couple of babysitters to make sure that it’s going on their schedule. So if it’s not on the calendar for us, like it doesn’t happen and it’s probably the same for you guys. So we recommend putting it on the calendar on a reservation, maybe put some money on it so that you’re sure to follow through. If you’re going to take a pottery class or go on a tour or anything to dinner, put some money down so that you’re forced to go because you need it.
Larry
It doesn’t always have to be a big to-do. You don’t have to you don’t have to make reservations. You don’t have to plan a whole big thing. It could just been spending time away from your kids out of your house. Very often times our dates have literally to spend to go sit by the water and talk with each other away from everyone else.
Alyssa
There’s been times that we’ve like brought our kids to your sister’s house and they watch them so we can come home and sleep and I watch Netflix like…
Larry
Yeah, my sister’s close, so we’ll just drop the kids off and yeah know, yeah we just get comfortable on the couch without having kids jumping on us and watching whatever kids show you know we get to put on what we want on for a few hours and then come back up. It doesn’t have to be a huge thing. It’s nice what it is when we did a pottery class and it was so much fun. And we made a whole night of it. We got dinner, did that got some ice cream after it was a whole lot of fun. And it’s small things, there’s nothing like neither of us are into pottery or anything it wasn’t like…
Alyssa
Oh, you’re actually super talented at it. Believe it or not.
Larry
Well that’s besides the point like neither of us were like gung ho like pottery is my jam, it was like this is cool. We should try it. Yeah. And we did and it was so much fun. So definitely try different things.
Alyssa
Yeah, take a cooking class, like anything you can learn will always be fun. We want to go back. I want to go back. I love ballroom dancing. And it’s even more fun like when we’re able to do it together. But that’s something that as we have more income and we’re gonna build it into our calendar so that we can actually do that.
Larry
Yeah, we took a handful of classes before our wedding. So we can do our wedding dance. And I had fun. It was again not my favorite thing. But it was fun.
Alyssa
Ya know like when we go to weddings we have a couple go-to moves are able to like string like half of a dance together and it’s good fun. People watch us and they’re like, oh my god, you guys are adorable. And it’s like, you’re so sweet. We look like ridiculous out there.
Larry
We dance five times a year.
Alyssa
So if you guys are struggling with some date ideas, we’ve got a list that we put together on the blog over at lyssmorton.com/blog. Over there, you’ll find a list of all sorts of fun date ideas for the different types of couples that you are so like adventure dates or lazy dates or, you know, classes that he could take and a whole bunch of fun things that we’re also working off of. We can spend more time together because at the end of the day, why did you guys become a couple if you don’t want to see each other?
Larry
You know, you’re married, or at least dating because you like each other and you like doing stuff with one another. So keep that part of your routine in your schedule because like I said, if you don’t do it, things don’t like to go well if you don’t spend time with one another.
Alyssa
So if you guys are struggling in your relationship or you want to just like bounce some ideas off of us we do double dating. You can go on our website, at the powercoupleshow.net and you can inquire about our website. If you have a specific question you want to ask us for the show. We’ll answer it live. If you don’t mind sharing with your friends leave us a review, tag us on Instagram. That’s @lyss.morton and his username is @mortomotoshow.
Larry
m o r t mo T Oh sh O W
Alyssa
That’s where you can find us on Instagram. And as always subscribe to the channel. Get notifications when we get a new show out. Get on the mailing list so you never miss it. And we’ll see you next week. Bye!
RESOURCES
- Submit your questions for us on The Power Couple Show Homepage
- Read the Best Date Night Ideas for Power Couples blog!
- Take the “What’s Your Perfect Power Couple Date?” Quiz
- Double Date Us!
- Check out the Making Mommy Moves Show
- Get on THE LYSST– Never miss an episode, blog, or exclusive deal for my favorite mom friends
CONNECT WITH LYSS
Follow me: @lyss.morton
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Follow Larry: @mortmotoshow
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